Cast: Shane West, Marla Sokoloff, Jodi Lyn O'Keefe, James Franco
Director: David Raynr
Producer: Paul Schiff
Screenplay: Mark Schwahn
Cinematography: Tim Suhrstedt
Music: Edward Shearmur
U.S. Distributor: Columbia Pictures
Like some kind of perverse cinematic plague, the teen comedies keep coming, each looking like a more washed-out xerox of the last one. After a while, they become all jumbled together: She's All That, 10 Things I Hate About You, Drive Me Crazy... It's hard to recall any distinguishing factors minutes after the film has ended, let alone months later. The only time a teen movie stands out is when it elects to do something bold (usually earning it the teen-unfriendly R-rating... but there's always video for those few members of the under-17 crowd who can't get past the inattentive ushers). Boldness is definitely not one of the defining characteristics of David Raynr's Whatever It Takes, a filim that, if it fails to merge with the pack, will only do so because it's a cut below everything else.
The latest trend in teen films has been to crib from classic sources (Shakespeare being a common victim). Whatever It Takes is the latest film to go this route, ostensibly being "inspired" by Edmond de Rostand's Cyrano de Bergerac (although this use of the material makes Steve Martin's Roxanne seem like an exacting interpretation). The film's bastardization of its supposed source aside, Whatever It Takes simply isn't any fun due in large part to the fact that these plastic, generic teenagers bear no resemblance to the guys and gals who wander the average high school corridors. There are far too many times when this movie descends from the level where it's merely dumb to where it's downright insulting to anyone with functioning brain cells.
Whatever It Takes transpires against the usual backdrop of the cool kids (a.k.a. jerks) against the nerds (a.k.a. nice kids). Needless to say, anyone shown to be a member of the former camp is depicted as being vapid, graceless, and generally without any redeeming values, while those in the latter group are kind, intelligent, and well-adjusted. The film's target audience is teenagers, who, to one degree or another, will relate to the concept of high school cliques. The ironic thing is that everyone, regardless of whether they're part of the "in" crowd or not, will identify with the film's geeks. That's because real nerds are quite a bit different from the sanitized versions presented in films not directed by Todd Solondz (Welcome to the Dollhouse). Who wouldn't want to be Ryan or Maggie (the nerds)? Assuming you ignore their stereotyped sidekicks, they have everything going for them, including looks. So what if once in a while Ryan gets the urge to play his accordion in his underwear while "Play That Funky Music, White Boy" blares on the radio? Or if Maggie has to act flabbergasted when someone remarks that she's beautiful? It's better than being clods like Ashley and Chris (the cool kids).
Ryan (Shane West, who does not have a big nose) has the hots for the hitherto-unattainable Ashley (Jodi Lyn O'Keefe, who played an identical role in She's All That). She's his dream girl. Along comes Chris (James Franco), one of Gilmore High School's top football stars and Ashley's cousin. Chris wants to go out with Ryan's best friend and next-door neighbor, Maggie (Marla Sokoloff, from TV's "The Practice"). So they strike up a bargain. Ryan will teach Chris everything he needs to know to woo Maggie, while Chris will do the same for Ryan regarding Ashley. That means that Chris will have to act smart and well-mannered, while Ryan will have to turn into a jerk (once he does this, he becomes a member of the school's top clique, á là Patrick Dempsey's character in the '80s film, Can't Buy Me Love). Ultimately, as everyone in the audience knows, Ryan discovers that Ashley is too shallow for him and his true love is Maggie. If he'd had the good sense to recognize this from the start, things would have ended mercifully sooner. Instead, we have to suffer through 90 minutes of familiar gyrations, expected betrayals, and insipid dialogue to get to the climax-at-the-prom, which rips off a classic scene from It's A Wonderful Life.
Of course, sex plays a big part in the film, as it does in all teen comedies. In going for the PG-13 rating, Whatever It Takes is forced to resort to clumsy innuendos and hidden-from-the-camera nudity rather than the refreshingly honest approach used by American Pie (which, in its raunchiness, didn't pretend to be something other than what it was). Sex in Whatever It Takes is the ultimate game by which the victor is selected. Will the good girl give in and sleep with the bad boy? Will the vixen capture the innocent protagonist in her wily web? Will true love triumph? Will someone please write a screenplay about real teenagers in real situations, instead of this recycled tripe??
One of the few things Whatever It Takes has going for it is that the two leads (Shane West and Marla Sokoloff) are attractive and appealing, and both show signs that, given a project of some substance, they might be able to act. It's more difficult to determine anything about Jodi Lyn O'Keefe and James Franco. They come across as stiff and uninteresting, but that's exactly what the director wants from them. Chris and Ashley are never supposed to eclipse Ryan and Maggie, and they don't.
At one point during the interminable proceedings that comprise Whatever It Takes, the screenplay makes an apt observation that will stir most viewers' memories ("Remember in grade school when you picked on the girl you liked..."). The comment isn't startling, but it indicates that the filmmakers remember something about what it was like to be a kid. Unfortunately, this is the only sign of it. Everything else is artificial and contrived, and even those hoping for a vicarious fantasy realization will be disappointed. Whatever It Takes doesn't even offer enough to satisfy that guilty pleasure.
© 2000 James Berardinelli