Starring: Jonathan Brandis, Beau Bridges, Joe Piscopo, Mako, Julia Nicholson-Soul, Danica McKellar,
Richard Moll, Chuck Norris
Director: Aaron Norris
Producer: Don Carmody
Screenplay: Donald G. Thompson and Lou Illar
Music: Alan Silvestri
Released by Triumph Releasing Corporation
Barry (Jonathan Brandis) is an asthmatic kid who lives his life in a dream world where he fights alongside Chuck Norris to rescue damsels in distress and defeat the forces of evil. In reality, Barry is so feeble that even the task of climbing a rope in gym class is daunting. With the exception of Lauren (Danica McKellar), all the kids in school make fun of him, pushing him around and bullying him as the mood suits them. To learn how to defend himself, Barry decides to take Karate lessons. The first teacher he visits, a demanding creep named Stone (Joe Piscopo), laughs him out of his studio. His second choice, Mr. Lee (Mako), agrees not only to teach Barry the moves, but the philosophy as well.
Subtle manipulation can sometimes make a good movie better. Overt, obvious manipulation is guaranteed to sink any endeavor. Sidekicks is such an example. This film goes out of its way to make the villains as nasty as possible, while lauding the assets of the heroes. Everything builds to a climax where good faces evil. Guess who wins. If you can't, maybe Sidekicks is your kind of picture.
I'll give the movie a little credit -- it's not afraid to have some fun at its own expense. Joe Piscopo is so over-the-top that this performance has to be intentionally bad. There are a few humorous moments during the course of the film's one-hundred minute running time, only I was never quite sure whether or not I was supposed to laugh when I did.
Often, a sports-related movie will work because of a likable character, a believable script, or a strong performance. Sidekicks has none of these assets, so the final contest at the end is pointless. In Sidekicks, victory doesn't matter. None of the characters have enough depth for it to be meaningful. Everyone in Sidekicks is a stereotype, from the sage instructor to the cute girlfriend. The kids in school represent the worst aspects of the "typical" American teenager. Sure, people are often cruel to misfits, but not like what's represented here. There isn't one character that I could accept as a real person.
Certainly, some of this movie was lifted from The Karate Kid. Mr. Lee's sermons have a familiar sound, but, in this setting, they ring false. The Karate Kid had a lot more going for it than Sidekicks could ever hope for.
Most of the action is provided by a series of dream sequences that have Chuck Norris and Barry shooting their way through various scenarios. Despite all the bullets and explosions, no one seems to get seriously injured. Here, death doesn't seem to be a reality.
For those who like to laugh at bad movies, this may be one to put on your list (preferably for video watching). Sidekicks is about as lame as a movie gets without being downright repulsive.
© 1993, 1996 James Berardinelli